Sunday, December 19, 2010

Full Term

Dear Baby,

When do I get to meet you??  Back when we were first aware of your existence, I had figured that by now I would already have you in my arms, as your sister was born two weeks ago at this time.  But you are different, aren't you?  ...Maybe even a little stubborn?  On Thursday, I got to see an ultrasound of you, head up, as expected, and you looked very comfortable, sucking on your little fingers.  I don't think you have any plans of turning booty-up, as you looked quite content... but I can pray!

Well, as of Friday, I am 37 weeks pregnant.   That's officially full-term!  I never thought  I would make it this far, but here we are.  So seriously, when do I get to finally hold you in my arms?  Your dad's birthday is on Monday, so it would be nice if you let him have his own day.  But other than that, I would honestly love it if you came soon so that we could take you and sissy to grandma and grandpa's for Christmas!

The cesarean has been scheduled for the 29th at noon, but you don't have to wait that long, baby boy!  Come out and meet your loving family; we're waiting...

Love,
Mama

37 weeks

Monday, December 13, 2010

Sorta bummed

Dear Baby,

This morning we went to the hospital in attempt to get you turned from breech to vertex.  This procedure is called an external version.  Unfortunately, the process was unsuccessful.  As it turns out, you are sitting so low in my uterus, that your little feet and butt are stuck under my pelvis.  In other words, you ain't budgin'!

To be honest, sweet boy, I'm a bit disappointed.  What this means is that I have to have cesarean section (surgery) in order to deliver you.  I really wanted to go through natural child birth instead.  I know it's not the end of the world for me, and this is the absolute safest option for you, so there is no question that I will do it, and willingly... but it still doesn't change the fact that I wish it could have been different.

Requiring a c-section with my history of fast and early labor is also a little nerve-wracking.  We have scheduled a planned c-section for December 30th, when I'm 39 weeks, but I would be surprised if you last that long.  What is more likely to happen is that I will go into labor and have to rush off to the hospital for an emergency c-section.  This reality stresses me out a little, but I am trying to prepare myself for the unexpected.

I'm sorry I won't get to hold you the moment you enter the world, little one.  That is unfortunately one of the stipulations of undergoing a c-section.  But I still cannot wait to meet you, hold you, and cuddle you, and I am at least grateful that I now know what to anticipate for your arrival.

Ready for anything...
Love,
Mama

36 weeks

Monday, December 6, 2010

A Little Scare

Dear Baby,

You gave us a bit of scare last night, little fella!  We thought maybe we were going to meet you already.  Last night, I went into false labor, and we had to go to the hospital.  While, we did find that I probably wasn't ready to deliver, we also discovered something that we weren't expecting: you are breech.  Ugh.

To be honest, baby boy, I'm a bit bummed about this.  I want to be able to deliver you vaginally, but if you don't turn around, we have to do a c-section.  I know that this won't be the end of the world if it happens, but personally, I would just rather avoid the surgery.

So, your daddy and I are praying about whether or not to go to the doctor and perform what they call an external version.  The doctor would physically try to move you from outside my womb.  There are a few minor risks involved, but we think it may be best, as they can preform a c-section right away if any abnormal complications arise.  We have an appointment scheduled for Monday, but we are still unsure if we will go through with it.

In the mean time, I am practicing some strange exercises at home in hopes that you will turn on your own.  The doctor said that often babies turn to vertex between 35 and 37 weeks... so I'm praying that you won't be stubborn, but instead you will flip like a good boy!

Don't be a stinker!  C'mon, little fella... Paddle! Swim!  You can do it!  Turn for mama!

Love,
Mama

35 wees

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Neglegent

Dear Baby,

I've been a bad pregnant mommy.  With your sister, I was so good at taking regular maternity photos of my belly growth and everything.   With you, until now, I haven't really taken any.  I'm so sorry, baby boy.  This doesn't mean that I love you any less.  It simply means that I am already a parent of one child, so business and forgetfulness keep me from commemorating this unique part of your life.

...But, if you look on the bright side, with you, I wrote a baby blog!  ...Something I never did for your sister.  So, in this way, my pregnancy with you has been recorded uniquely.  Each one of you is different, so each of you have a different story.

So here it is, baby, my first real prego belly pics.  Me at 34 weeks gestation:



...Sorry it took me so long to capture you under my belly in photos, little guy!

Love,
Mama

34 weeks

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Getting Rounder

Dear Baby,

This is my pathetic existence now:


As your daddy says, "Now I'm helping two girls in my home with their socks."  Yep.  I'm to round to comfortably reach my feet and get my socks on.  It's a good thing you have such a loving daddy who is willing to help me with even the most mundane of daily activities.

Love you, baby!... Even if you make things inconvenient!

Love,
Mama

34 weeks

Monday, November 8, 2010

The 2 Month Countdown... or less?

Dear Baby,

It's roughly two months until you are due to enter this world... but I wonder if it will be less.  Your sister was born a whole month early, so I'm ready for anything.  When Charity was born, I was almost 36 weeks pregnant, and right now with you, I am already 31 weeks.  I can't believe how quickly time goes by.  My midwife has already advised me not to travel after next week, just incase you come early like your sister.  But even if you come on your due date, two months is not a very long time!  You are going to part of our lives sooner than we know it!

Your daddy and I have hardly begun the proper preparations for your arrival, so I hope you don't come too early!  I have so much to do still:  clean out the guest room that will become your nursery, set up your nursery, register for all the baby things we need for you, register at the hospital, clean up your bassinet, set up emergency contacts incase I need some last minute help or sitters when I go into labor, pack my hospital bag, find a going home outfit for you.... not to mention decide on your name!

So, take your time, baby... I know the Lord knows exactly when you will enter our lives, and everything will be fine.  I just pray that when you do come -- whether you are early, late, or on time -- that you will be healthy and strong.  We cannot wait to meet you, son!

Love,
Mama

31 weeks

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

What's In A Name?

Dear Baby,

I just want you to know that I don't like it any more than your dad does or than you would.  I hate that we haven't decided on a name for you yet.  Every week people keep asking me, "Do you have a name for the baby yet?" ...and the answer is always the same, "No... we're still having a hard time deciding..."

I don't know why it has been so hard, baby, but to determine what you will be called for the rest of your life is a big responsibility!  I don't want to mess this one up!  Every time your dad and I go over the names we have considered, I have my reasons for liking and disliking each one.  In Biblical days, children were named for what the parents either had experienced, or for what they hoped their child would fulfill someday.  I want to your name to have similar significance and meaning.  We tried hard to do this for your big sister, and we want the same for you... but finding boys names with significance that don't sound "weird" seems to be more of a challenge.

I know that whatever your name will be, my dear son, it will come to represent who you are and what you mean to this family.  ...And to that name will also be attached great love and affection.  I hope that you like whatever your father and I end up choosing, cause you're going to have to live with it!

I have some peace in knowing that Jesus knows who you are by name, even before we do!

I love you, my son,
Mommy

29 weeks

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Charity's Game

Dear Baby,

Your big sister and I have a little game that we play together, to help her understand that you are going to be part of our lives...

Mama says, "Where's Baby Brother?..." 

"...There he is!"

This is largely a game of peek-a-boo with my belly, but Charity seems to have at least some small concept that you, a baby, is in my stomach or related to my stomach. It's pretty adorable to watch, and I am just glad that we got it represented in photos.

...She is just going to love you, baby!

Love always,
Mama

27 weeks

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Pregnancy Woes...

Dear Baby,

You were so nice to me in the first trimester... Why couldn't you have given me one more trimester to enjoy before reminding me that pregnancy and parenthood has it's moments of misery?

I know you don't do it on purpose.  It's just a bummer that I'm already uncomfortable this early in the game.  You actually started making me grunt and groan about two weeks ago.  Just like I had experienced when carrying your sister, I am having piercing pain under my right rib.  I have occasional back pain, and unlike with your sister, you are making my feet swell!

I guess I'm just a bit bummed because the second trimester is usually a time when pregnant women are fairly content because they are out of the woods from morning sickness, and still not big enough to get uncomfortable, but big enough to take pride in their precious baby bump.  While I'm still proud to look down and see my protruding belly, a reminder that you are part of my life, I am sad that that same belly is making me ache and groan already.

Be as gentle as possible, baby!  But either way, I love you... and the physical discomfort now (large or small), is all worth it if I get to have you in my life in a few short months!

Love,
Mama

22 weeks

Saturday, August 21, 2010

It's a Boy!

Dear Baby,

Yesterday, we got to meet you on the ultrasound machine, and guess what??  We found out that you are a boy!  Your daddy and mommy were so surprised and so excited!  Last week we went to see a friend who is a sonogram tech and when they looked at you, you were very shy, but they thought maybe you were a girl, so when we found out that you were a boy it was such a nice surprise!  Your daddy got especially excited.  He asked the technician, "Are you sure? Really?!" several times.  We are so happy to have a son, baby, and we are so excited for Charity to have a little brother!

The best part, though, was simply that we got to see you in there.  We got to see you moving and we got to watch you wave your hands and see that miraculous spinal chord that always takes my breath away.  God is such a miracle worker that you are just perfectly growing there inside me! I don't know how He does it, but I love Him for it... and I love you!

Now comes the fun of buying blues and greens, ball caps and polo shirts, toy trucks and trains.  What a change to our family having a little man in it will bring!  We cannot wait to have you a part of it!

To put the icing on the cake, today was the first day I felt you kick!  Thanks for saying hello!

Love,
Mama

20 weeks

Sunday, August 8, 2010

I Know You're In There!

Dear Baby,

While I haven't felt you kicking yet, I can tell that you are growing in my womb!  My belly is starting to pop out more, and I'm beginning to detect slight movement.  It's so exciting to have those first sensations of you inside my tummy.  Sometimes, I feel you weighing down deep in the bottom of my abdomen, and sometimes I can even feel you bare up against my skin.  You feel small enough to fit in the palm of my hand.  It's just another wonderful reminder that you are in there!

Love,
Mama

P.S.  I'm also excited because in less than two weeks, we get to meet you for the first time and hopefully find out if you are a boy or a girl... so don't be shy, little one! :)

18 weeks

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Already Thinking About Your Room...

Dear Baby,

As usual, I am already delving into ideas on how to transform our now guest room into a charming baby nursery for you.  Your mommy loves to decorate, so this is one of the fun parts of preparing for your arrival!  So far, this is my inspiration:

fleur de l'ormeau- bib necklace with carved abalone shell detail

Now, I know what you're thinking.  This looks like awfully feminine inspiration when I don't even know if you are a boy or a girl yet.  But I'm mostly inspired by the colors.  Your Auntie Erin made this beautiful necklace, and I think the contrast of teal and green is awesome.  You see, your future room is already painted in the same lovely avocado green color that you see in the necklace.  I figure we can use teal as the other main color, and then if you are a girl, I will pair it with something like magenta, and if you're a boy, I will pair it with a deep firey orange!  What do you think, baby??

I'm obviously very excited to have you join our family and our home.  I can't wait for you to enjoy your future nursery!

Love,
Mama

16 weeks

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

A Constant Reminder

Dear Baby,

You have been so nice to me during this pregnancy so far! When I was pregnant with your sister, I was feeling sick and throwing up all the time.  I couldn't even eat the normal foods that I liked.  But with you, it's completely different.  I feel so good, in fact, that I sometimes almost forget that you are there!  But then each day I see a reminder of your presence:  A positive pregnancy test sits in my bathroom drawer.  And every time I see it, baby, I'm reminded of you and how much I love you!  I cannot wait to meet you and know who you are!!

Love,
Mama

10 weeks

Saturday, May 29, 2010

The Sweetest Sound

Dear Baby,

Your Mommy and Daddy are so relieved and so happy! Yesterday we went to the doctor.  I was so afraid that they would have bad news; that Jesus would have decided that you needed to be with Him instead of us.  But then the sonogram technician said, "You are a lucky woman, there is a baby with a heartbeat in there!"  She switched on the sound, and your family got to hear your precious little heart beating away at 167 bpm for the very first time.  I cried tears of joy and relief.  We want to have you in our lives so badly, dear baby, and I cannot wait to meet you.  Thank you for not making me too sick.  Thank you for staying strong and healthy.  I love you.  I cannot wait until I get to see you again!

Love,
Mama.




8 weeks

Friday, May 21, 2010

Anxious Heart

Dear Baby,
I'm not going to lie.  I'm scared.  For the past five days any symptoms I have possessed that tell me I am pregnant have melted away.  One may think that this is a good thing that I am no longer super fatigued or nauseated, but it only makes me wonder what is going on with you.... is your heart still beating strong?  Is your little life safe and protected?  All I can do right now is pray and wait.  I know that your life is in our Heavenly Father's hands either way.  I will know for sure in a week, when the doctor searches for your precious little heartbeat.  I hope to hear it thumping away, alive and strong!  I love you. sweet baby!  You are very very wanted by your family!  Hang in there so we can meet you for the New Year!

Love,
Mama

7 weeks

Monday, May 3, 2010

Your Presence Known

Dear Baby,

Not fifteen minutes ago, I found out you were coming.  I already love you so much.  I didn't think our little family was ready for you yet, but apparently, our Jesus does.  I know that in the next nine months I'm going to be enduring a lot to keep you alive and healthy.  But know that I will keep you safe and warm as you grow until you are ready to meet your mommy and daddy and big sister!

We love you.  We can't wait to meet you!  

Love,
Mama

4 weeks